


you will never understand, even when you hold my hand (i just feel alone, feel alone)

by hambamthankyoumaam (Random13245)



Series: sleepovers in my bed [4]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: F/F, F/M, Finally, First Kiss, Happy Ending, Laurens and Hamilton are Dumb, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, and oblivious, finally this series can end happily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 20:59:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10839336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Random13245/pseuds/hambamthankyoumaam
Summary: “You love him, don't you?”“Was it that obvious?”or; a happy ending for a series all about pining





	you will never understand, even when you hold my hand (i just feel alone, feel alone)

**Author's Note:**

> this is kinda shit, I'm not all that proud, but hey, I wrote something.

“You love him, don't you?”

“Was it that obvious?”

“John…” Lafayette said sympathetically, sitting down next to him.

“Don't even _try_ to tell him I ‘need to talk to him.’ It's not happening.”

“And why not?”

The question struck John. He'd come up with a million reasons why he couldn't tell Alexander, but right now they all seemed silly.

“Because…” John struggled, “have you heard him talk about Eliza?” He turned to Lafayette, watching his reaction.

“ _Mon ami_...” Lafayette sighed. “Let me tell you something… They broke up.”

“What?” His head snapped up.

“Make no mistake,” Lafayette began slowly, “they definitely liked each other. Very much. But they both… realized they were in love with someone else. It was almost funny when Alexander told me, how he had blurted the truth and she _laughed_ , and basically said the same thing in return.”

“...Dare I ask who they're each in love with?” John had already started formulating, he wasn't sure about Eliza, but he thought maybe for Alexander, it was Maria Lewis, whom he'd had an on-again off-again thing with a year ago.

“Ah, now that, dear Laurens, I cannot say.”

“Because you don't know or because you don't want to?”

“The latter.” Lafayette said with a smirk. “It's not my place to tell. But, he is your best friend, I'm sure you could just ask him about it.”

 

“I heard you and Eliza broke up.” Is the first thing John says when he sees Alexander after school, walking home as usual.

“Oh…” Alexander said with a bittersweet smile, “yeah. Wasn't meant to be, I guess. We both-” he stuttered, “wanted to see other people.”

“Who's ‘other people.’” John asked, feigning friendly interest and elbowing Alexander in the side.

“Well… I'm not sure if Eliza has gone through with her end of it, yet, so keep this secret until she does. Maria Lewis.”

John reeled. “Eliza’s in love with Maria?”

Alexander nodded sheepishly.

“And you?”

Silence. John counted the beats of his heart, pounding louder than the sound of the wind around them. One, two, three.

“Uh,” Alexander hesitated.

“Hey, I'm your best friend, you can trust me.” John prodded gently.

“Yeah… best friends.” Alexander sounded almost sad. “Um… well first you'll need to know one thing so this isn't such a shock; I'm bi.”

Another moment of silence settled in. John contemplated his response.

“And I'm gay,” he said, though that was already known by their friend group, “so?”

Alexander laughed for a moment, a nervous, bubbling sound. “Okay, okay.” He steadied himself, taking a breath. “I,” pause, “like,” another deep breath, “you.” Alexander rushed the last word, so much so, John wasn't sure he'd even said it.

“What?”

“Shit, don't make me repeat that-” Alexander cut himself off. “I like you.” He dictated his words with as much clarity as he could.

“Oh.”

“...Oh?” Alexander sounded worried, apprehensive. “What does that mean…?”

“Fuck,” John started to laugh suddenly, “it means I like you, too.”

“Oh.” Alexander said, and then slid into the laughter with John. “We’re idiots, aren't we?”

“Incredibly stupid.” John agreed. They paused their walk, landing right underneath a tree- what a cliché, John thought for a moment, but didn't care. They leaned close, but both hesitated.

“Can…”

“Yes.”

And lips met, soft and gentle, and more than John could have ever imagined. He felt all of the loneliness that had built up over years of pining for Alexander melt away.


End file.
